Immeasurable, inexpressible, unsearchable, surpassing knowledge or understanding…

How do you describe something that is indescribable?  You can't!  How do you measure the immeasurable?  You can't!  We can't understand things that are beyond understanding and we can't express the inexpressible. In short, we can't comprehend God's amazing attributes.   We can't know or understand all there is to know about God.  But we are given enough knowledge to prove He is our creator and that we messed up big time, causing our future to look bleak until God's perfect Son, broke off from the Godhead and became human (the only sinless human to exist) so He could pay the penalty for our sins (‭‭Romans‬ ‭6:23‬ ‭ESV‬‬

For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.) and give us the opportunity to accept His free gift of salvation so we can spend eternity in heaven with Him instead of a tortured in hell - alone, eternally separated from God.  

Honestly,  it's impossible to truly comprehend how God is 3 persons in 1 (Father,  Son and Holy Spirit).  It's impossible to understand how God could be everywhere at once, know everything there is to know and be the most powerful force in existence.   But He is all those things and more.   What's almost harder to understand is how an all powerful, all knowing God could feel such love and compassion for me, that He would send a part of Himself to die so He could save me from a fate worse than death.  

I'm GLAD God is incomprehensible.   If He could be understood and explained,  He would not be the sovereign God He is.  I'm GLAD He knows everything,  sees everything,  has control over everything- because I am weak and foolish and I make lots of mistakes.   I need someone with the big picture in view to wisely guide me down the correct path.

I have spent time off and on over the years considering the deep things of God.  One of my favorite hymns is The Deep Deep Love of Jesus (vast, unmeasured, boundless, free!).  And I enjoy dwelling on the thought that His depths are beyond finding out.  I know I will never understand His ways or His thoughts - at least not THIS side of heaven.   But I think He likes me to think about Him as often as I do.  

Here are some verses I searched out this morning on this subject.   I know there are more and I'm looking forward to finding them on another day:

“and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might”  Ephesians‬ ‭1‬:‭19‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus.”  Ephesians‬ ‭2‬:‭7‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure.”  Psalm‬ ‭147‬:‭5‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Thanks be to God for his inexpressible gift!”  ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭9‬:‭15‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Behold, God is great, and we know him not; the number of his years is unsearchable.”  Job‬ ‭36‬:‭26‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and his greatness is unsearchable.”  ‭‭Psalm‬ ‭145‬:‭3‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!”  ‭‭Romans‬ ‭11‬:‭33‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“To me, though I am the very least of all the saints, this grace was given, to preach to the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ,”  Ephesians‬ ‭3‬:‭8‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“God thunders wondrously with his voice; he does great things that we cannot comprehend.”  Job‬ ‭37‬:‭5‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.”  ‭‭Psalm‬ ‭139‬:‭6‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”  ‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭7‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.”  ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭3‬:‭17‬-‭19‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Music and Light

Music often times helps me through tough days.  I have an upbeat Spotify playlist that I listen to in the car while driving around grocery shopping and running errands.   I often play my upbeat playlist when I'm baking or cooking.  Music helps motivate me when I am feeling tired and like I just need a nap but have to fix dinner for my family or bake banana bread like I did today because our bananas weren'tgoingto make it much longer.   

And certain songs resonate with me at different times.  One that has been running through my mind the last couple of days is a song by Jason Gray called Glow in the Dark.  The lyrics are:

Sometimes the world feels like a mess

Full of drama, full of stress
And life puts a fist right in your ribs
You can hide if you choose to
And no one would even blame you
Or you can let them see how you deal with it

That even in the darkest place
His love can make you radiate

Doesn't matter how deep, how dark the night is
Keep hoping, keep on shining
And they'll see His light burning in your heart
And if the road gets rough, just keep your head up
Let the world see what you're made of
That His love's alive in your deepest parts
Like a flame, like a burning star you can shine right where you are
He made you to glow in the dark

Don't be ashamed of your past
If you're shattered like a piece of glass
The more broke you are the more the light gets through
Show your wounds and your flaws
Show them why you still need the cross
Let them see the work He's doing in you

That even in the darkest place
His love can make you radiate

Doesn't matter how deep, how dark the night is
Keep hoping, keep on shining
And they'll see His light burning in your heart
And if the road gets rough, just keep your head up

Let the world see what you're made of
That His love's alive in your deepest parts

Like a flame, like a burning star you can shine right where you are

He made you to glow in the dark

Doesn't matter how deep, how dark the night is
Keep hoping, keep on shining
And they'll see His light burning in your heart
And if the road gets rough, just keep your head up
Let the world see what you're made of
That His love's alive in your deepest parts

Like a flame, like a burning star you can shine right where you are
He made you to glow in the dark

I was thinking about this song because in my Bible reading the last few days have been verses about light - Jesus as the light of the world and shining through us and verses contrasting light and darkness.   I decided this morning to search up verses about light throughout the Bible and came up with a good selection (although not exhaustive - the Bible has a lot to say about light and darkness.   But here is a list of verses I put together this morning:

“The sun shall be no more your light by day, nor for brightness shall the moon give you light; but the Lord will be your everlasting light, and your God will be your glory.”  ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭60‬:‭19‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“for at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light”  ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5‬:‭8‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light; those who dwelt in a land of deep darkness, on them has light shone.”  ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭9‬:‭2‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed.”  John‬ ‭3‬:‭20‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“the people dwelling in darkness have seen a great light, and for those dwelling in the region and shadow of death, on them a light has dawned.””  Matthew‬ ‭4‬:‭16‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil.”  ‭‭John‬ ‭3‬:‭19‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.””  John‬ ‭8‬:‭12‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“If then your whole body is full of light, having no part dark, it will be wholly bright, as when a lamp with its rays gives you light.””  ‭‭Luke‬ ‭11‬:‭36‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.”  ‭‭1 John‬ ‭1‬:‭7‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“In him was life, and the life was the light of men.”  ‭‭John‬ ‭1‬:‭4‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“He uncovers the deeps out of darkness and brings deep darkness to light.”  Job‬ ‭12‬:‭22‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.”  ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭4‬:‭6‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”  Psalm‬ ‭119‬:‭105‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“So Jesus said to them, “The light is among you for a little while longer. Walk while you have the light, lest darkness overtake you. The one who walks in the darkness does not know where he is going.”  John‬ ‭12‬:‭35‬ ‭ESV‬‬

““You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.”  ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭5‬:‭14‬ ‭ESV‬‬

“I have come into the world as light, so that whoever believes in me may not remain in darkness.”  ‭‭John‬ ‭12‬:‭46‬ ‭ESV‬‬

With MS (or maybe it's just age) comes some vision difficulties like having a more difficult time adjusting to a dark room.  Because I have quite a bit of dizziness and have problems with balance, I rely on my eyes to help keep me from bumping into things or triping over furniture.   So at night when I have to get up to go to the bathroom,  I have to be really slow and careful with my hands out in front of me feeling for the bathroom door.  My husband can't sleep with a light on so our bedroom is quite dark at night.  But in the hallways there are nightlights shining so that, when I get up in the early morning hours before everyone else, I can see well enough not to fall down the stairs. 

I think of unbelievers as people groping around in a dark room looking for direction and we, as Christians are the little night lights shining the way.   When someone flips the light switch and floods the room with light - that's Jesus,  chasing away the darkness and shining the light of salvation.   I want His love to shine so brightly in me that the darkness flees and the world will see the truth and be saved!

My Christmas Letter, etc.

Merry Christmas!!  I sent out the Gobble Gobble song to everyone for Thanksgiving.  It’s a fun song by Matthew West that makes me laugh every time I hear it and I love to laugh! 

But there’s another song by Matthew West that is more serious and it really embodies the way I view my own life journey.  It’s called Wonderful Life and the chorus goes like this:

It'll send you flyin' high 

It'll bring you to your knees 

It's the heartbreak and the happiness 

And everything between 

It's the laugh until it hurts 

It's the hurt until you cry

Can't have one without the other 

It's how you know that you're alive 

In this broken and beautiful 

Gone mad and magical 

Awfully wonderful life

It IS a wonderful life!  I have been thinking a lot about endurance lately.  The verse at the top of this letter/blog post was in my devotional reading a few weeks ago and the idea that God is a God of endurance really stuck with me.  I always remember that He is a God of love, peace, comfort but endurance?  That’s not one that comes up very often.  The New King James version translates it as “patience” which is the same idea I guess but I prefer the English Standard translation in this case because I like the thought and because I think it is the intended meaning.  His endurance means He is a God who patiently endures and helps us patiently endure the trials of life.  He is faithfully there for us to lean on and He loves us enough to endure our suffering for us if we let Him.  He carries our heavy burdens and with the weight lifted from us, we are free to experience joy and the peace that is beyond understanding (Philippians 4:7).

Then there's the idea that He is the God of encouragement!  Again, the New King James version translates the word as "comfort" and He IS the God of comfort.  But He is also the God of encouragement!  He encourages us to do our best.  And when we fall, He lifts us up, dusts us off and encourages us to try again. 

And speaking of needing endurance and encouragement as we walk through each year on this earth - here is my annual review at the close of the year - looking back on the events that shaped it.

I remember, at the beginning of this year, thinking that I was relieved that the busyness of the holidays were over and was grateful for the beginning of a new year.  But I also remember feeling that the new year (2024) was going to fly by and I would blink and Christmas would be upon me faster than I was ready for.  And guess what?  It came even faster than I thought!  I don’t like the months when there are so many activities we can hardly keep up.  I love celebrations and fun activities, don’t get me wrong, but I like to enjoy the moments and have time ahead of an activity to really plan and make it special and not be feeling so exhausted when the day arrives that I am yawning my way through all the fun.  I also need time after an activity to catch my breath, let my body recover and I like to savor the fun moments after they are over.  This fast paced roller coaster is difficult for me.  I am not complaining though because I also know that it wont always be this way.  In 2 1/2 years our daughter will graduate from high school and go off to collage and we will be left with only 1 teenager in the house and for only another 3 years.

I will go through what I can remember off the top of my head about our year:

January - I tripped coming into the garage from taking the garbage out and I fell - hard!  I hit my head on the corner of a portable workbench and gave myself a real shiner and had a big goose egg on the side of my head.  But, I escaped serious injury and made a full recovery.

February - Valentine’s Day always brings flowers and fun gifts for me and the kids!  Our daughter performed in a talent show with some of her friends - she performed 2 songs which required multiple rehearsals.  My husband started taking our S-10 pick-up apart to paint and work on restoring it.  Our daughter and I helped heft the bed off the frame.

March - My husband really went to town on prepping the truck for a new paint job.  We celebrated my Mom’s birthday at Olive Garden.  We attended an Easter Sunday breakfast at church and got to sit at a table with our missionary friends before they left to head back to the mission field in Ecuador.  And of course there was an Easter service and a fun scavenger hunt I set up for the kids that afternoon. 

April - We got my husband to take a break from his work on the truck to go hiking through St. Edward’s State Park.  I had my annual MRI which revealed that my MS is stable.  Our son got his braces off!  The Volvo (1965 Volvo 1800S) that my husband inherited from his Dad finally got sent from the body shop working on the restoration out to the sand blasters and returned a few days later revealing that the body was in great shape!  My husband and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary by going out to dinner at Anthony’s Homeport in Edmonds.  We celebrated my sister’s 50th birthday at the end of the month.  My husband finished painting truck and got the bed liner sprayed in.  And our daughter made her first trip to the Skagit County Tulip Fields.  

May - Our son attended his 6th Grade Coronation and dressed like a Medieval Knight - it’s a big deal at the school the kids attended.  The body shop started working on the Volvo in earnest.  We celebrated Mother’s Day and our daughter’s birthday by going out to dinner at Anthony’s Homeport.  After we got home, emergency equipment rolled into our neighborhood and we spent the evening and most of the night out in the street helping console our neighbor who came home from a work trip to find husband had shot and killed himself earlier in the day.  After the police and other emergency people and equipment had left, we were outside alone and the Northern Lights lit up the sky - it was the first time I had ever seen them in person!  Sadly, another friend of ours lost her battle with pancreatic cancer on our daughter's birthday.  But it’s not sad for HER, she is in heaven with Jesus and feeling better than she ever felt here!  Our daughter turned 15 and we had a party at our house and later I took her and some friends to celebrate at the mall.  Our daughter ’s Spring choir concert was also in May.   

June - Work on the Volvo continued.  I attended 2 memorial services - the kids went to one with me.  We celebrated my birthday at my Mom’s house and another dinner at Anthony’s Homeport.  My husband even baked me a cake!

July - The kids watched the Whidbey Island fireworks display with the youth group because they do theirs on the night of July 3.  We had a 4th of July BBQ at our house with my Mom and sister and our neighbors had a small fireworks party that night.  Our church started renovation work on the sanctuary.   The kids and I got free slurpees on 7-11 day.  We had dinner with friends we hadn't seen in years and the kids had never met who were visiting from California.  The kids got to go to an Aquasox game with the youth group.  The kids and I helped spread mulch at my Mom’s house.  The Volvo got painted.  And our daughter got her driver’s permit and started driver’s ed!  Yikes!

August - The kids’ orthodontist had their annual summer party that Jacob and I attended again this year.  The body shop finished the Volvo and we took it home where my husband will work to get all the rest of it put together.  My husband had sinus surgery.  I took the kids to the Evergreen State Fair and a group of our daughter's friends met her there.  

September - Our daughter started 10th grade.  Our son started 7th grade at a new school.  The kids and I got to go visit some friends who are in their late 90’s and are housebound.  What a hoot!  My husband got the engine into the Volvo.  Our son had a neuro-psychological exam in Issaquah so we took my sister out to lunch while we were out there.  At the very end of the month we went to Anthony’s Homeport again to celebrate my husband's birthday because he had a trip scheduled on his actual birthday.

October - My husband's birthday started the month but he was out of town so we celebrated early.  Our daughter's choir sang at the homecoming game and the next day I ran her all over the place for Homecoming preparations, pictures and the main event and then the after party.  We celebrated our son's 13th (yikes!) birthday with a party at home and pizza at MOD Pizza.  Our daughter had so many friend events and parties that I can’t remember all of them but I DO remember her fun choir fundraiser performance event  - “Rev Factor”.  The kids also had a fun cooking challenge event at youth group.  Our son and I carved a pumpkin for Halloween and then I took him out trick-or-treating - he was a medieval knight.

November - Our daughter started out the month with a sweet 16 birthday sleep-over party at a friend’s house. Our daughter baked her friend a cake and decorated it with a picture of Donald Trump because her friend is a mega MAGA Trump fan.  We voted in the presidential election in early November.  Our daughter also passed her written driver’s license exam and went to Whidbey Island for a choir retreat.  My husband continued work on the Volvo.  We had a “bomb cyclone” storm that knocked our power out for 4 days - school was canceled for 2 days.  Our daughter's choir got to sing at the opening day of the gingerbread village event at the Sheraton hotel.  We had a leak in our roof that ultimately led to a total roof replacement right before Thanksgiving.  And I am writing this on the day after Thanksgiving.  We had a really nice time with my Mom and sister and a yummy Thanksgiving dinner at our house.  My husband made the sausage stuffing and the loaded baked potato casserole, the kids helped me make the pumpkin pies and my sister cooked a turkey breast in her Instapot and brought it over.  We baked a ham, had cranberry sauce (whole berry AND jellied), my sister also cut up all the apples for the apple/mandarin orange salad, we had green beans, white corn and dinner rolls.  We all ate too much!  I took the kids shopping today because our daughter wanted to get her Christmas shopping done for her friends.  I have never been black Friday shopping before and it wasn’t as crazy as I thought it would be but then again, we avoided the mall.  My husband worked on the Volvo while we were shopping.

December begins on Sunday and my husband has the entire month off from work.  We only have a few short weeks to decorate, finish shopping, wrap gifts and fully prepare for Christmas.

I admit now that I had to look back on the pictures I have taken throughout the year to jog my memory.  But now that I see how each month was increasingly more packed full of activities (and I only hit the highlights) I know why I am so tired approaching the end of the year!  But I am also so thankful to be here, at this point in time, and actually feeling confident that the Lord will give me the energy, strength and focus to accomplish the rest of the crazy that December will inevitably bring.  He IS, after all, the God of endurance and encouragement (among other things).  And I hope and pray this very long letter/post (sorry!) finds you well and ready for Christmas and for the exciting adventures a new year will bring your way.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!