Remember the Grieving

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 - Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

There are a number of grieving people in my circle. People who have had spouses or other loved ones pass away - some more recently than others. But regardless of the length of time a loved one had been gone, people will always be in need of lovingkindness. We so often neglect to continue comforting each other months or years after we have experienced a loss.

My mom is one of those grieving for a spouse. Although my dad passed away nearly 7 years ago now, I know she still feels acutely lonely at times. She keeps that to herself for the most part so until I check in with her, I am not necessarily aware of her need for fellowship. But it IS a need. Without it, she will be more vulnerable to spiritual attack.

Last week, a widower in our church who lost his wife in May to pancreatic cancer sent me an email. He has been doing so much better in recent months and has been adjusting to the massive changes in his world surprisingly well. But he misses the fellowship with me and others when things weren’t going as well. And this morning he told me that he misses having someone there to physically touch him. In the wake of his wife’s passing, I was regularly sending letters to him, emailing him and talking to him for extensive periods of time at church - frequently hugging him and putting a hand on his shoulder. And I am not the only one who provided this level of comfort. But school started in September and then October hit and my busy children have had my brain on overload and I stopped checking in on him mid-week. How quickly everyone moved on to the next crisis and left this grieving soul behind to struggle on his own. I am guilty of neglect!

My husband still grieves for his parents. His dad passed away more than 15 years ago and his mom passed away 9 years ago. He is in need of regular and ongoing comfort.

Through all of this I am realizing the need for us to check in REGULARLY with people who have lost close loved ones - especially spouses. Most of them will never let on how much they need a loving squeeze or a check-in text or email. But they DO need it!

So, while we comfort our friends and families who have experienced more recent losses, let’s remember not to neglect those who have been experiencing more long-term losses.

Power in Prayer

“And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us.” - ‭‭1 John‬ ‭5‬:‭14‬ ‭ESV‬‬

It seems like we, as Christians all believe to some degree that prayer has power. We don’t always see proof of God’s protective covering over us or those we pray for though and sometimes we even question the effectiveness of our prayers.

I try to get a variety of perspectives on the events happening in the world around us so I often read things that wouldn’t necessarily be picked up on and published in standard media outlets. Lately I have seen much evidence that prayer is having a major impact on our world.

One story was actually related to me by my daughter who saw an Instagram reel from a satanist-turned-Christian. She had previously been someone who was used by demons to identify people who were susceptible to attack. She said that it was obvious when someone was praying because there was a blue protective shield over them and the demons would stay away because they were afraid of those people. Prayer protects us. Even when we aren’t necessarily praying for our own protection, prayer IS protection in and of itself. Be constant in prayer.

The other story I read just the other day. It was a story about self-proclaimed witches trying to cast spells to negatively impact former President Trump in this election. There were quotes from forums discussing potential spells they could cast to harm President Trump by “witches” discouraging it saying it would not only waste time and energy but actually have the opposite effect because “there is an energy around him that feeds off the negativity and turns it for good” and acknowledging that “there are a lot of people praying for him”. What was amazing to me was the acknowledgement that prayer is EFFECTIVE! They admit that God is real and provides real protection and yet they reject Him!

The sad fact is that the conversations quickly turned the focus on to Trump supporters saying “they are more vulnerable”. And they are probably right because many of Trump’s supporters are not believers in Christ. We need to pray for the protection of our Nation.

Yesterday my husband read to me something that was about steps to dismantle a free society and it is scary to see how the current administration has been working so obviously and ao effectively to implement these steps with very little pushback from us! So we need to pray, but we also need to vote and to speak out against the obvious attacks on morality and our freedoms.

The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. James 5:16b                

Be Joy!😃

“A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭17‬:‭22‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Today I went grocery shopping. Mundane task that seems simple enough but for me it is exhausting and anything but mundane. And yet, I absolutely love grocery shopping! Today I spent time praying while I was driving to my first stop (to fill up the gas tank). I was praying I would be open to anything the Lord brought my way. And I was praying I would recognize any blessings or spiritual battles.

My shopping day was uneventful - there were a few really big smiles that came my way from other shoppers (which I returned of course) but nothing worthy of mentioning in a blog post. 😉 I DID bring a stack of gospel tracts with me and placed them in several shelves throughout the store. 😁

After stopping for fuel and going making 3 different stops, I got home and put my groceries away. I didn’t have time for lunch before I had to leave to pick up my son from school (early release today). He took his shower and did his chores and then I left to pick up my daughter. After I got home with her I had to get my son to his counseling appointment. My daughter stayed home to do her chores (bless her for being responsible to do the cleaning while I was gone). I stayed in the car while my son went in to talk to his counselor. I was so tired! I really wanted to take a nap in the car but I didn’t want to be sleeping when the session was over so I toughed it out.

On our way home traffic was horrible and there was a lot of construction on our route. I stopped to let someone turn from a side street and enter traffic in front of me. And there it was! The woman driving that car smiled so big and waved so aggressively in thanks to me that it made me smile and wave aggressively back and as she merged in, I got a good look at her license plate. It was a custom license plate that said BE JOY. I drew my son’s attention to it and he got a big smile on his face too. That driver, smiling and waving like crazy to me was being and spreading joy.

We have so many reasons to be joyful and it’s really important to SHOW that joy outwardly. It’s contagious and it’s exactly what our hurting world needs.

I want to be joy, show joy, spread joy and share my joy in the Lord.

An old Sunday school song keeps repeating in my head this evening: “The joy of the Lord is my strength”. By the time I had that encounter with the joyful driver, I was depleted of strength and energy. Her joy and her license plate reminded me where my strength comes from and how much I needed to call on the Lord for strength to get through the rest of the evening. I felt a big boost in my energy level after that and was able to get dinner on the table, lunches packed, etc. without the energy crash that often comes after a long, busy day.

One person can make a difference in the life of a perfect stranger. Be joy - be that person who lifts the spirits of those around you!

PRAY!

“But stay awake at all times, praying that you may have strength to escape all these things that are going to take place, and to stand before the Son of Man.” - ‭‭Luke‬ ‭21‬:‭36‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Early yesterday morning the oldest of 5 children from a Christian home in Fall City shot and killed his parents and 3 of his younger siblings and badly injured the remaining sibling. I didn’t know the family but I have several friends from all around the area - people I have known since high school - that went to church with the family and homeschooled their children in the same co-op as this family. I spent a sleepless night last night in prayer for everyone touched by this tragedy.

This morning I got a text from a dear friend in a different state asking me to pray with her - entering into spiritual warfare on her behalf because of a heavy oppression she has been feeling recently.

On the radio last night I heard a host talking about signs that he believes point to America rejecting the trend of atheism and being ready to turn back to God. I have been noticing hopeful signs of this as well and pray it comes to fruition.

These seem like random, unrelated events but I believe they are connected. The Holy Spirit is moving and working and turning hearts to the Lord. We need to, as believers, pay attention and listen to the direction of the Lord. We need to be strong witnesses, loving examples and work in harmony with the Spirit to reap the harvest.

We need to be in CONSTANT prayer because the devil doesn’t want anyone to be saved and he certainly doesn’t want our Nation to return to morality. So he is craftily using all the tools he can wield to paint a picture of Christians and conservative families that choose to educate their children at home as unhinged, unstable and to be looked upon with fear and distrust.

Don’t be distracted by the darkness and all the chaos! Get on your knees and PRAY!

It’s never too late to have a happy childhood!

Matthew 18:2-3 - Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them, and said, “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven.

Our son was born with a unique set of traits that hinder him from maturing at the same rate as his peers. Yesterday was his 13th birthday and his list of desired birthday gifts included things like Lego sets, fidget toys and animated movies. He asked for some practical things like shirts and gift cards as well so he is trending in the right direction. But in general, his list this year looked very similar to the list he had last year.

Our son likes to spend time on his iPad. He is still using the first iPad we ever bought for him. It has 32G of memory that was long ago maxed out making software updates a challenge and it won’t accept the most recent upgrade of Safari because it’s just too old. It lags when playing online games with his sister and it needs to be replaced. But he didn’t ask for one for his birthday. We decided to buy him a new iPad and surprise him with it. We loaded it with all the games (saving all his progress) and applications he has on his old iPad - we even put the same pictures he was using as wallpaper and on his lock screen. It was the last gift he opened at his party on Saturday. We expected him to be so excited! This was a newer and much more powerful iPad with a 256G capacity! But as he opened his gift he looked sad and looked up at us and said “I just don’t know if I’m ready to give up my old iPad.” Wow! The iPad is still sitting in the box, waiting for our son to decide whether he wants to keep it or not - he hasn’t even turned it on to give it a try. And while it was disappointing that he didn’t show the excitement in receiving this expensive gift, I am proud of him for being honest about his feelings and not just acting excited to make us happy. We are concerned about his difficulties with forming such strong emotional attachments to things snd we are working on it. But he showed integrity and honesty that is often lacking in kids today and is refreshing in a teenager.

We often try to encourage our son to grow beyond toys and animated movies. We talk to him about trying to fit in better with his peers. But lately I have been watching our son and finding myself wondering WHY we want him to watch more mature movies, etc. There are a lot of great animated movies that are fun, innocent, wholesome and that appeal to all ages. Why do we want to fill the minds of our children with even hints of the sinful world around us? Our son shows a desire to maintain his innocence and is more careful about what he watches than most people. In many ways, it is admirable to hang on to that innocence for as long as possible.

I think our son’s response to the new iPad was a lesson in being content with what we have. It shocked us all because we all know how much he values time on a screen. We also are aware that our son is very sentimental and doesn’t like to let go of old toys, etc. But while he doesn’t like to let go of the old, he is usually excited about the new - gifts, experiences, food, etc.

In some ways, our son has learned the value of being content with what you have and rarely asks for more. A typical 13 year old would be asking for a phone. Not our son, he has never once asked for a phone. He trusts our judgment in deciding when it is the right time for him to have a phone.

I am trying to step back and look at our son in a different way than I have in the past. He doesn’t develop strong emotional connections with people easily but he is friendly and kind to absolutely everyone. He waits and watches to see how a person behaves and treats him over time before he decides to count them as a real friend. He guards his heart.

We were forced to take our son out of the Christian school he attended for 5 years and put him back into the public school system because of some of his unique learning needs that the private school was unable to help him with. It has been an interesting journey. There have been blessings along the way but one of the hard things is all the foul language our son is exposed to just in daily conversation between kids at his school. It’s something he brought up the other night. But he hasn’t picked up the bad language and told me that he is ignoring it. And when he heard a lesson in history trying to claim a different story about Christopher Columbus than the one he heard at the Christian school, he asked me about it and rejected the revisionist history lesson. He is guarding his mind.

So, while we DO want our son to mature and take on more responsibilities and to learn to take an interest in learning how to do more, do we really want him to allow more of the world in to his heart and mind? I don’t think so! We want him to know enough to keep himself safe. But if he never wants to watch anything more “mature” than Despicable Me or Garfield movies, what is the harm to him? And if he is careful about who he calls a friend, he is less likely to be influenced into making poor choices.

This is a long way of saying that I think WE should be more like our son. More innocent, more honest, more content, more careful about who we trust and what we watch.

Another thing about our son to be admired is his solid, unshakable faith in God and his willingness to share that faith with others.

Our son is himself wherever he goes. He is confident and has a healthy sense of self esteem and he is not influenced by the world around him. There are things he needs to work on as he grows older. But when I really think about it, there are things about him that are qualities to be admired and that so many of us strive for years to achieve and never quite grasp. We all should try to be more childlike, less cynical, more protective of our hearts and minds and this is ultimately what leads us to Christ!

We are being watched

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,” - Hebrews‬ ‭12‬:‭1‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I was reading this passage this morning and I remembered a speaker at our church who used to say “Let’s see what the therefore is there for.” In this case, the THEREFORE comes after Hebrews 11 which is often referred to as the “faith hall of fame.”

The last 2 verses of Hebrews 11 say:

And all these, having obtained a good testimony through faith, did not receive the promise, God having provided something better for us, that they should not be made perfect apart from us. Hebrews 11:39-40

Then, the first verse of Hebrews 12 indicates that these great men of the past are witnesses to our lives and watching how we walk in our faith! I had never really thought about that before. I knew that the angels were watching. But Moses? Abraham? Noah? David? Jacob? Isaac? Daniel? And a whole host of men who died before Jesus came and paid the penalty for their sins. They are now waiting and watching, relying on us to contribute positively and help bring about the fulfillment of scripture and I am INTIMIDATED by that thought! Daniel, who braved the lion’s den rather than be disobedient to God is watching me live this comfortable life and is probably so disappointed (understatement) by my ridiculous fears of being offensive to my neighbors if I share the gospel with them.

I can’t now move forward without thinking about the crowd of biblical greats watching me and praying I will be faithful and obedient in my walk with Christ. We are generally aware we are being watched by the world, by our children, by our neighbors, etc. But would it change anything about your attitudes, actions, thoughts or conversations, to know that we are being watched by the Old Testament saints? It does for me!

Meals Together

“He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love.” - Song of Solomon‬ ‭2‬:‭4‬ ‭ESV‬‬

I heard on the radio yesterday that less than 30% of American families sit down and eat dinner together as a family. I knew that the number had been declining in this busy world but that low percentage really shocked me! The program I was listening to was about eating healthier and they were promoting the health benefits of preparing your own meals at home with fresh ingredients and taking time to sit down with your family and eat a balanced meal that includes fresh fruits and veggies.

I was surprised because it wasn’t THAT long ago that the majority of our population gathered together as families at dinner time. I grew up in a neighborhood with and played with kids from catholic AND atheist families and one thing we all did every evening was go inside for dinner with our families.

When I reported this shocking number to my daughter, she said she wasn’t surprised. She said that her friends (at a Christian school) all think it’s weird whenever she has to disconnect from them to have dinner with her family. I thought that surely the percentage of families in a Christian school or in our churches who eat dinner together would be much higher but apparently I have been out of touch with reality!

I pray we, as a society, get back to a place where we recognize the value in setting aside the craziness of our schedules and regularly carving out time for meals (without phones or electronic devices) with our families. It benefits us in so many ways! We eat healthier, we practice our face-to-face social skills which is so desperately needed in this world, we discover things about each other and grow closer as a family, we pray and thank God for our food which teaches our children to be thankful and how to pray, we have opportunities to teach good manners and when dinner is over, the kids have an opportunity to learn how to help and contribute by clearing the table. There are no downsides to eating meals together - it is a matter of being intentional about the habits we develop and instill in our children.

Yes, we are busier than ever before and we can’t ALWAYS eat together. Tonight our daughter will be eating pizza with friends at a fun group event so she wont be home for dinner. However, that is the exception rather than the rule. The three of us that are home WILL eat dinner together (hamburger/vegetable soup that I made yesterday with cornbread and fruit). Everyone who is in the house at dinner time knows that we will unplug from our devices, set aside our projects, gather at the table, pray and eat dinner together.

I am really curious now because I thought that was what everyone in my circle of friends did. I didn’t think our family was an outlier in this area. I am interested to hear whether we are alone in hanging on to this traditional family value. Will you comment below if you also make an effort to eat dinner together every evening?

Love can be hard sometimes

John 15:17 - These things I command you, that you love one another.

You never really know how you will respond in a certain situation until you are faced with it. It’s vital to be daily in God’s Word and to maintain a close relationship with the Lord so you have an immediate source to turn to for help. And choosing a loving response can look very different depending on the circumstances.

One way I choose to love my family is by being open to hearing about every last detail they want to share with me about their lives. I am not always immediately available to listen for an hour about the coolest new features of an iPad game but I generally find the time at some point in my day to focus my attention and listen to whatever my husband or children want to share.

As a result, my family knows that I am a safe person to talk to about everything from hair products to vehicle maintenance to homework woes and especially about the more serious issues that come up in life.

I didn’t know that my daughter would bring home so many serious issues going on with her friends - and starting so young! When she was in second grade, my daughter befriended a girl whose family had moved here from Arkansas to begin a church plant. She was the oldest of 3 children and she confided in my daughter that she and a 5th grade boy at their school who, also attended her church, would sneak off into a closet at church and “kiss on the lips”. I was immediately concerned for the safety of this little girl and my innocent daughter didn’t understand why. I had choices to make. I REALLY didn’t want to have this conversation with my 2nd grader - she was too young! But I realized that she was going to be a person who people trusted and confided in and if I was going to be a Godly example, I needed to handle this moment properly. So, after praying about it and explaining in the most sensitive way possible the reason her friend was potentially in danger and why I needed to act, I contacted her parents and shared what I had heard. Thankfully, as it turned out, she had been lying for attention. Her parents took it seriously and she apologized to my daughter and there was no resulting damage to their friendship.

Being loving to our children means being loving toward their friends as well. I don’t think it would have mattered at the time to my daughter if I hadn’t intervened. But because I did, she learned several valuable lessons - the most important of which is that love sometimes means doing something hard and her Mom is willing to do the hard stuff of love to protect her and her friends.

Fast forward to 5th, 6th and 7th grades where my daughter and several of her friends were targeted and threatened by a girl who was mentally challenged but had unfettered access to the internet and was, herself, being exploited by a pedophile. I repeatedly met with this girl’s mother over coffee to talk to her about what was happening with her daughter and how it was impacting MY daughter and, as sweet as she was to me, she refused to believe her sweet daughter could have been behaving in such ways and came to see my daughter as a bully who was spreading lies and trying to hurt, not help her daughter. Ultimately I had to bring the issue to the attention of the school administration for everyone’s safety (thankfully they got the police involved) and in the end, her parents withdrew her from the school - still maintaining her innocence despite overwhelming evidence. It was a painful process but I would not have been showing love to anyone if I hadn’t stepped in.

Now, I am known by my daughter and her friends as the one that can be counted on to have the hard conversations with other moms and to do my best to get help for her friends when they need it. High school is emotionally very difficult. I have already had one conversation with a mom about a potential eating disorder in her daughter. My daughter now asks her friends when they are concerned as a group about someone “Do you want me to ask my mom to talk to their mom?”

Until I am asked to get involved now, I generally just sit back and pray while I wait to hear how serious the problem really is. But I am not afraid to step in and do the hard thing because I love genuinely. Jesus loved ME. What He suffered for me was far worse than any discomfort I might feel about confronting another mother about a problem her child is facing and praying with her about how to help. And the really funny thing is how my daughters friends all started calling me “mom” and programmed my number in their phones a “other mother”. But it’s kinda awesome too.😉

Hot Mess

“And let our people learn to devote themselves to good works, so as to help cases of urgent need, and not be unfruitful.” ‭‭Titus‬ ‭3‬:‭14‬ ‭ESV‬‬

There are days when I try to do too much and at the end of those days I am a hot mess. Today was one of those days.

Normally I try to pace myself and don’t try to take on more than one major project per day. Major to me (a person with MS) has a different definition than for a healthy person. Grocery shopping is a major project for me and it is a huge energy drain even though it’s something I truly enjoy doing. I went grocery shopping this morning.

Volunteering at my son’s school - walking around the courtyard and monitoring the kids during their lunch break is a major, energy draining project for me even though I think it’s important and I enjoy it. I volunteered at my son’s school today.

These activities combined with getting the kids to and from school left me a hot mess and having real trouble trying to even THINK about what to fix for dinner (no left-overs to fall back on).

Enter my daughter. She stepped in and saved me - and dinner - tonight! She has been asking for a week if she could make fettuccini alfredo. I bought all the necessary ingredients last week but my husband doesn’t like to be a guinea pig for her to test her new cooking skills on - and he gets really agitated when people make messes while cooking. So the only time our daughter cooks is when my husband is out of town.

I try not to let on when I’m struggling to come up with a meal idea so I had just started brainstorming with the kids when my daughter said “Can I make chicken fettuccini alfredo tonight?” My immediate answer was a relieved and enthusiastic “yes!” She is not an experienced cook but she has made recipes on her own before and she knows her way around the kitchen for the most part. I consulted when she asked but dinner took very little effort on my part - she even set the table and prepared fruit to go with it. And it was REALLY good! Her brother loved it and was still talking about how good it was as he got ready for bed tonight.

Speaking of hot messes - my daughter made a big mess on the stove while she was cooking, it was too hot to clean up right away and, had my husband been home, he would have been hovering over her the entire time and ultimately would not have been able to stand the mess she was making and would have taken the project over.

I have learned through my experience with MS fatigue that it’s important to allow ourselves as well as our children to be (and make) a hot mess sometimes. In making messes, we all learn valuable lessons - whether we are cooking or re-potting a plant or stepping out in faith to try something new. It’s okay to need help sometimes and to let others see our human weaknesses.

Another lesson I have learned is that my children WANT to help in practical ways. They want to be trusted to step in and handle an important task (like making dinner). They not only WANT to feel useful, they NEED to feel like an essential part of our family. And they ARE!

Finally, I am learning to accept that I don’t have to be strong every moment of every day. My children love me even when I’m a hot mess and can hardly articulate a thought because I’m so tired. They never complain when I take a nap or ask them to do tasks I would normally do myself. I don’t want to take my family for granted but it is sure a good feeling and a relief to know that my children are capable of helping and eager to help when my husband is out of town and I am flying solo as a parent.

I am so very blessed!

Elections Matter

James 4:17 - Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin.

I am going to vote in the presidential election as soon as I receive my ballot. The candidate I plan to vote for isn’t my favorite. But the consequences of the other major candidate winning this election are dire.

As Christians I think there is often an unwillingness to participate in elections, preferring instead to leave the results to God. But if Christians don’t vote, we will have to live with the consequences of our inaction - and this attitude is not Biblical.

The message we heard on a Sunday several weeks ago - from Joshua 3 spoke to this. One of the lessons was to stand up and be bold! Another lesson from that chapter was that we can’t expect God’s blessings if we don’t take action. God didn’t part the Jordan River until the priests stepped into it and got their feet wet. He expects us to stand up for those who can’t defend themselves and to call a turn when our leaders are engaging in open sin and rebellion against God.

We can’t expect God to continue blessing America when we elect leaders who directly oppose His laws and actively work to implement laws that protect sinful behaviors (like the wholesale murder of unborn babies; not holding criminals responsible for the crimes they commit; teaching woke ideology and revisionist history in our public schools; encouraging children (with or without parental involvement) to undergo permanent changes to their bodies in an effort to change their God-given gender; allowing millions of people to flood in to America illegally and then expecting taxpayers to support them by giving them free housing, education, medical care, etc.).

I can’t sit back and do nothing. We as Christians have done that for far too long and the toll that has taken on society is evident everywhere you look. The very least I can do is exercise my right as an American to vote and to do my best to elect a candidate who will preserve our freedoms, maintain our support for Israel, prioritize the best interests of our Country over providing foreign aid, etc.

I don’t agree with everything my chosen candidate stands for and if I’m honest, I would have preferred a different nominee. But God doesn’t ask us to choose perfect leaders - there has never been a perfect leader in the history of humanity save Adam before the Fall and Jesus who came as a servant.

Please vote. It’s important and your vote DOES matter - even in Washington State.

Anger

Jonah 4:4 - Then the LORD said, “Is it right for you to be angry?”

I never saw my Dad angry. He never raised his voice in anger in our home when I was growing up. I am sure he felt anger welling up inside sometimes but he had learned to control his response to those feelings and kept his anger under control.

I wish I could say I was like my Dad in that regard but I admit I have yelled at my husband in the past and have yelled at my children.

I have learned that it is unwise to yell at my husband and just serves to provoke anger in HIM so I don’t do it anymore and my children HATE it when I yell. It really scares them because it’s not something they see in me very often. Scaring them like that is NOT my goal and makes me feel horrible (as it should)!

I hope I am learning how to better control my responses to feelings of anger. It has been awhile since I raised my voice but I know I communicate my anger in more subtle ways now that are arguably equally damaging.

Angry responses are sinful and they take a major toll on our families. When we are reckless with our words, we cause permanent damage. We can’t take our words back - once they are out our mouths, they can inflict pain on our families that can have serious future ramifications.

I try to ask myself if it is even right for me to be angry in a given situation. More often than not, the answer is a resounding “no!” So any response (loud or subtle) to my unjustified anger is automatically going to be sinful and wrong.

Our world is an angry place to be right now. There is SO much hate, anger and violence in this current environment. We should not carry that with us into our families or neighborhoods. We need to guard our hearts and minds and shield our loved ones from the anger we might feel by being immersed in the yuck of this sinful world.

I am a work in progress. Lately I feel like my resolve to control my response to feelings of anger and frustration seems to constany be tested.  I am never going to achieve perfection. But I am daily striving for it and I pray you are too!

October!

“Stay dressed for action and keep your lamps burning,”

‭‭Luke‬ ‭12‬:‭35‬ ‭ESV‬‬

October is our busiest month since our daughter entered high school. We always had a flurry of activity on a couple of our October weekends with 2 birthdays to celebrate. But things kicked in to hyper gear last year and this year October is even MORE action-packed.

Tonight is Homecoming and there are activities planned all day long at friends’ houses and a park before and after the actual Homecoming event. After homecoming is over, our daughter dives right in to activities associated with her upcoming choir fundraiser performance showcase (called Rev Factor) in which she will be performing 5 different songs (1 solo, 1 trio, 1 all girls group and 2 all-choir performances). This will require multiple rehearsals, setting up before and cleaning up after the performance, etc. Interspersed throughout the next several weeks are fun hangouts with her friends.

If she’s not talking about Homecoming, she’s talking about Rev Factor or some friend hangout that is upcoming. She is excited! It’s easy to get caught up in her excitement!

Our son turns 13 and his party is next Saturday. That’s what HE is excited about and talks about frequently but it’s not something our daughter is really keeping on her radar unless it is briefly brought to her attention.

Being 15, our socially active daughter needs someone to chauffeur her around to all her various destinations and in most cases, that someone is ME. Additionally, someone needs to plan our son’s birthday party, buy and wrap gifts, bake and decorate a cake, etc. Guess who that someone is every year? Yup, ME.

It brings me so much joy to help make holidays and other events special so I am NOT complaining about being so busy.

But the reality is that it all takes a toll on me physically. This is where having MS presents a bigger challenge than for healthy people. After a couple of really active days, I can crash hard and need a day of NO activity to recuperate. Again, I am not complaining. I know my limitations and I plan for rest days and I would rather be involved in life than spend my days trying not to do anything that would drain my energy.

But there is another member of our family who requires my time and attention - my husband. He is not caught up in the excitement. Quite the opposite, he is agitated by the disruptions to our family and he can talk about nothing but what a hardship it is for our daughter to make all these plans and expect us to not only pay for all if it but to provide transportation which means she is not the only member of our family who is frequently gone. He laments the fact that she is prioritizing her friends over time with her family.

I have been thinking a lot about this over the past many days because I am also the sounding board for everyone. I have come to the conclusion that we have a lot of people in our family who are consumed with themselves and their own experiences who can’t seem to step back and consider what their impact is on those around them. They have different perspectives and they are not wrong in and of themselves. Our daughter is a teenager with a great group of friends and she is involved in an awesome choir. She is a straight A student so it’s hard to find fault with the myriad of events and activities she is involved in. But my husband is also right. Our first priority should be to our families and we should be sensitive to each other’s needs and the impact we have on each other. Our son SHOULD be excited about his upcoming birthday party - there’s nothing wrong with that.

But what I don’t hear from any of my family members right now in the middle of this crazy month of activities is much in the way of truly showing love for one another by showing interest in the things the others are excited about. My husband is working on restoring a car that was his Dad’s and he wants to talk about it - but the kids never ask to hear about how it’s going. Our daughter is excited about her month of events but my husband and son don’t ask her much about any of it. Our son is excited about his upcoming party but he's the only one who ever brings it up. Everyone is talking about their own things and no one else is showing any interest. And I am just exhausted by it all.

Does this sound familiar to anyone?

This is a sin problem. It plagues all of us. We are selfish by nature and it is HARD to stop thinking of ourselves for a minute and show GENUINE interest in others. Not just pretending to listen and waiting for a break in the conversation to jump in and talk about whatever is on our own minds. I’m guilty of this too! With all that I am having to keep track of, it’s so easy to spend my time talking about my own thoughts and concerns and to be oblivious to the cares and concerns of others.

But what is the most concerning is that we aren’t keeping our minds focused on God. I have caught myself feeling anxious about how I am going to have the energy and strength to get through this month. Suddenly the Lord will bring me back to Him and reminded me that He will be my strength. What a relief!

it is so hard to admit when we are wrong or have been selfish. But we can’t show love toward each other OR truly love and hear what the Lord is telling us when we are too busy being consumed by our own thoughts and activities. We need to be constantly on guard for this. This is why we are supposed to “Pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17) - because when we stop praying, our minds get flooded by so many thoughts and concerns and we get so distracted that we can’t hear the directions the Lord is giving us. That makes us ineffective as witnesses and it's a trap laid by our enemy that we so easily fall in to.

We can’t be discouraged by our failures though. We are always forgiven and given another chance.

In the Eye of the Storm

Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me! For my soul trusts in You; And in the shadow of Your wings I will make my refuge, Until these calamities have passed by. Psalm 57:1

I have a cousin who lives in Florida. Tonight they are hunkering down and bracing for the approaching hurricane Milton, touted as the most destructive storm to hit their area in 100 years. We are watching from a distance and praying mightily for her and her family as well as for all the people in the path of this monster storm.

We can’t do anything to stop the storm from hitting Florida. It is so hard to see something like that coming and knowing people will lose homes, pets, vehicles and other property, their lives in some cases, etc. It is heart-wrenching and we feel powerless because there is NOTHING we can do to change the path or destructive strength of this hurricane. The only thing that can be done is to warn people it is coming and urge those in the danger zones to evacuate to safety - and pray.

There is another, much more damaging force at work in this world. Its’ path is far more destructive and devastation will be total. The Bible has warning labels throughout its’ pages. Those of us who have secured our safety must warn the others about the coming storm. Judgment is barreling toward this world and only those of us who have put our faith and trust in Jesus Christ will be saved. Everyone else will endure tribulation and everlasting punishment and certain (and eternally painful) death. Its heartbreaking and we are powerless to stop the coming judgment. All we can do is warn those who have continued to reject Christ as God, urge them to reconsider and accept Jesus as their Savior - and pray.

Armor of God

When my son was in 3rd grade (he's in 7th now), he memorized the entire Armor of God passage in Ephesians 6.  We practiced it together every day and from that time forward, without fail, I have mentally and prayerfully put the Armor of God on each morning as I get dressed for the day and pray the the Lord would equip me to fight the spiritual battles I will be facing throughout the day.

This morning, Ephesians 6:10-18 were the verses to read with the Our Daily Bread devotional and verses 11 and 12 really stuck out to me as I thought about the world we are living in.  We REALLY CAN'T stand against the evil in this world without the protection and full armor of God.  We are in over our heads. 

I do what I can when I am with my husband and children to keep their minds focused on the Lord and their hearts filled with love.  I read a devotional to them at breakfast time, we pray together at breakfast and dinner,  I read devotionals and pray with them (including my husband) at night, I draw angels to put on the kids' bedroom doors after praying for them secretly in the night... but when my husband leaves on a trip and I drop the kids off at school,  I can't have any influence over what people or circumstances they will encounter.  

I trust that Jesus and an army of angels are walking with them, providing a protective forcefield around them.

And I pray that for you too.  I purposely don't send group texts or emails.  I pray for you as I choose your name from my contact list.  Because we all need prayer and encouragement.   We need to keep reminding eachother that we are not in this fight alone.  Most importantly,  we have an all-powerful God.  But He put a whole bunch of us together on this earth and He intended for us to work together as one body - different gifts that we are supposed to use to bless and encourage eachother.

Another devotional I was reading this morning had Joshua 3 and 4 as the reference and I was just amazed by God 's timing because we are going through Joshua at our church on Sunday mornings and the speaker who spoke on Joshua 3 pointed out that God didn't part the Jordan River until the priests with the Ark of the Covenant actually stepped into the river.  It takes faith to step in the direction God is leading - to use the gifts He has given us - but until we move in the direction He points us, God will withhold His best blessings.

So, suit up into your spiritual armor and go out there and be a blessing!😃 

The Blessings of MS

The Blessings of MS

I was diagnosed in 2014 with Relapsing-Remitting Multiple Sclerosis after 10 years of mysterious and intermittent symptoms and several mis-diagnoses.  When a general neurologist finally had to admit that I did, indeed, have Multiple Sclerosis, she beat around the bush, hemmed and hawed and frustrated my husband to the point he had to leave the room while she tried to break the news to me in her awkward way.  I was instantly relieved to finally have an answer to the medical mystery so I could get started on researching treatment options.  She referred me to an MS specialist for confirmation, which I appreciated.

April of this year marked 10 years since that hilariously awkward diagnosis and it took 10 years of investigation before I finally had answers.  So I have been living with MS for 20+ years now, and not once have I felt angry or bitter about it.  The Lord allowed MS into my life and into my family (make no mistake, when 1 person has MS, their whole family is impacted by it too) for a variety of reasons I believe.  I find new reasons all the time that having MS is a blessing.

I was a highly capable person pre-MS.  I was high energy and could multi-task with great efficiency and accuracy.  I was extremely organized and I had a high capacity memory.  I took on tasks with confidence - even if I didn’t initially know how to do them - because I was confident in my ability to figure it out.  I have a whole file full of recommendation letters, one of which claims I could almost walk on water.  I was saved but I was too busy to stop and listen to the voice of the Lord in my life.  I prayed but I didn’t wait and listen for the answer.  I believe the main reason the Lord allowed MS into my life was to slow me down and to disable me (like when He touched Jacob’s hip and dislocated it while wrestling with the Angel if the Lord) so I would recognize that, as capable as I was, I needed to lean on Jesus for strength.  I needed to recognize that I can’t get through a single second of the day without God’s help.  After all, He controls my heartbeats and every breath I take.  Functions of life that are so automatic that it’s easy to take them for granted.  Suddenly, I have a disease that makes so many of the basic functions of life more difficult.  Things take more thought and effort - showers, getting dressed, fixing meals, grocery shopping, even just the thought effort that goes into planning meals - are all fatiguing.  I have to rely on prayer and the arm of the Lord to get me through each day.  And I am so THANKFUL!  Thankful that I have a God who is available, who cares about little old me and who is faithful!  I am so thankful that He slowed me down so I could get closer to Him, hear His still small voice, and see His hand accomplishing so many great things all around me.  I would have missed the richness God has to offer me in this life had I not gotten MS.

Another reason I believe God allowed MS into my life is to protect me.  Ha!  Yep, that’s what I said!  Everyone who has MS has a unique set of symptoms.  One symptom that my MS has brought on is a blunting of emotion.  I used to be an extremely emotional person.  I cried even at touching commercials.  But God knew that I felt things a little TOO deeply and He knew what challenges were in my future that would require some emotional separation to make wise decisions.  One of those events happened in 2017 when my Mom and sister needed help deciding whether to let go of my Dad (who had Parkinson’s with dementia) when he was in the hospital after a blockage had caused him to go septic.  I don’t believe I would have been able to be involved in that decision-making process had I not had a diminishing of emotions due to MS.  And now, we are going through the process of getting our son in to a neuropsychologist to be evaluated for what looks like ADHD or mild autism spectrum disorder or potentially both.  Maybe you don’t have a strong bond with your Dad or your children but my Dad was the strongest, most kind and generous person I had ever known until I had a son.  My son is the sweetest, most friendly and kind-hearted boy who wakes up every day with a smile and attacks life with vigor.  My son and my Dad are two of the most amazing people I have ever met.  And yet, I can go through these really hard challenges without letting my emotions cloud my judgment and I am GRATEFUL!

Speaking of amazing people, I have an amazingly capable daughter who is an enormous help to me.  I appreciate her so much and I don’t think I would see how amazing she is if I was as capable as I used to be.  She is such a joy and encouragement and she has had to step in to help me in ways I probably wouldn’t have asked her to if I didn’t have MS.  And yet, she describes my MS, not as a disability, but as a super power!  

I believe MS was brought in to our family to teach us ALL about grace, patience, humility, etc.  My husband has been working so hard to support me but he is grieving the loss of who I was - the highly capable me who could match and even exceed his energy.  I believe the Lord slowed me down so my husband would have to slow down too - to take a step back and realize the things that are truly important.  God first, each other, our children, family, friends, neighbors - all more important than us as individuals - all more important than chores, jobs or our personal pursuits.

The Lord has taught me, through MS, that each day is a gift.  That I need to cherish every moment with my husband and kids.  That I need to do what I can to encourage others, share Jesus with my neighbors and spread love and joy wherever I go.  And most of all, I have come to recognize that putting God first each day, praying constantly, reading my Bible each morning, talking about the Lord’s amazing design for each day, is necessary - vital - to living joyously each day.  Keeping my eyes on Jesus and off my circumstances frees me of the burden I might otherwise feel with MS.

I don’t have enough time to list every blessing MS has brought into my life but if you ever bump in to me in the future, don’t be afraid to smile or to laugh with me if I flub a word or trip on the hardwood floor.  I don’t take myself too seriously - I have too much joy inside for that!